I think about Him, I wear crosses in remembrance of Him, & I worship Him on Sunday’s. And I know this isn’t much but if you knew what I was like when I was younger, this is a new me.
I used to be forced to go to church when I was younger so this only made me rebel and one who never believed in Him. My siblings have also never believed in Him so I just followed in their footsteps. But then my big one day made me go to GREEK conference. I decided to go because I was interested in actually settling this debate of his existence once and for all. During this weekend conference, I saw, felt, & really noticed that He was actually in my life this entire time. After being prayed for there, they touched on things that have happened or were occurring at the time with me that they wouldn’t of known without the presence of God.
Thinking back to this moment of tears falling down my face, realizing that I have betrayed & not followed Jesus even though he has done so for me, & I felt guilty. So ever since, I have been attending church regularly up at CMU for His House & when I can go home, I revisit the Church of Christ where I was baptized. Just today, I saw the priest who baptized me & showed me who God was. Bill has been a huge mentor in my life & really saw the potential in me. He told me today “I want you to know you are always in my prayers”. This meant a lot as I barely am able to see him from being at CMU every weekend. Even when I was a teenager, he used to always ask me “why are you wearing all this makeup? You look beautiful without it”.
When Bill baptized me that day in the pool under the stage of our church, I remember every single moment leading up to it. Being about 8 years old in my white dress, I remember sitting infront of the church with 3 priests’ hands of oil on my head, praying different truths & hopes into my future. I remember having Bill take me into this pool & having his hand on my upper back & his other hand in the air. He looked me in the eyes before dunking me under & asking “you ready?” After nodding, he layed me under the water & I distinctively remember looking up as I felt Gods presence there watching over me (this was my first experience of Him as I never opened my eyes or unplugged my nose underwater).
Ever since, I have felt the need to follow God in every thing I do. To wear his cross as jewelry to symbolize His presence & protective qualities are always watching out for me. And the quote that I always think of him & follow with every action or learning opportunity that happens with me, “everything happens for a reason”.